Some of us enter into relationships where we practically destroy them because we ignore the initial warning signs that the person we are attracted to is an emotional train wreck or a time bomb.
Too often we indulge in physical, mental, or sexual attraction only to end up heartbroken, angry, bitter, vindictive, or stuck on an emotional roller coaster.
These five warning signs will help you know early on if he / she is an emotional train wreck or a time bomb:
1. Has superficial emotions: is quick to share too much early in the relationship, to say “I love you”, to want to marry or commit to you. Usually in less than a few weeks of dating someone, you will hear that you are the love of their life, that they want to be with you forever, and that they want to marry you. You will be showered with instant attraction, endearing names, and overwhelmed with attention and promise. Remember the old saying “If it’s too good to be true, it probably is (too good to be true)!” Quick warm-up is always a sign of shallow emotions that then cause her to separate from you as quickly as she committed.
2. Cannot handle emotions – He / she becomes emotionally overwhelmed easily and holds a grudge, clings to bitterness, cannot handle frustration, criticism or rejection. On first dates, you will often hear stories of what others do or did to him / her and how “evil” the world is, etc. But these stories quickly revolve around what you are doing or not doing and what is hurting you emotionally. The relationship becomes one of blaming, accusing, arguing, explaining, defending yourself, trying to convince him to feel different about this or that, etc. You feel like you are constantly walking on eggshells.
3. Does not show emotions: does not get emotionally involved, is not emotionally expressive (for example, it is difficult to get excited about things) and does not sympathize with the pain of other people. To put it coldly, it’s emotionally bland and cold. From the first date, he will play with your emotions: he is late, he promises to call you but does not, he agrees to meet and “forgets” to call you to cancel, “forgets” the things that are important to you, and so on. Most of the time, you are not sure where they stand regarding their feelings for you. When confronted, you may admit that you don’t really feel anything for you, and you do so very coldly.
4. Prone to emotional outbursts (short fuse): Explodes easily, yells or is rude to a waiter / waitress, customer service people, other drivers and even perfect strangers or does dangerous things like driving too fast because / she is angry, breaks / throws things, gets into fights, threatens others, etc. He / she is clearly letting you know that he / she has that ability and ability, and that it could come your way. There will come a time when he / she will have no one to vent to and you will be the obvious soft and easy target. And it’s not just the men. Women may not necessarily be physical with her temperament, but every sentence she says and the many lies she can make up are just as hurtful.
5. Use emotions to manipulate – Create situations in which you become the center of attention – everything is exaggerated and distorted in dramatic proportions. This playing the victim as being persecuted by others (“I am a very misunderstood person”); feigning or exaggerating an illness or causing or causing an injury (for example, he / she appears bruised and cuts and expects you to feel bad for him / her and even take care of the injury), etc. You find yourself spending all your time trying to make him feel good about himself. The more attention you pay to it, the more plans it will come up with. It’s like trying to fill a bottomless pit!
Take a few words of wisdom from someone who has been there: If it doesn’t fit, don’t force it.
If you are emotionally healthy yourself, your emotions are your source of energy for making good decisions, reading and dealing effectively with other people’s feelings, optimizing your ability to have healthy relationships, enjoying work, and enjoying life.