Friends, did you know? According to a recent report from the Department of Justice:
797,500 children under the age of 18 were reported missing in a one-year period, which included runaways, children missing for a few hours or late for custody release, etc.;
203,900 of them were victims of family kidnappings;
58,200 of them were abducted by someone the child knew at least partially;
115 children were victims of “stereotypical” kidnappings by a complete stranger.
I quoted these numbers so as not to downplay the kidnappings in any way. My heart truly goes out to the victims and their families for having to live through such a nightmare. However, these statistics helped clarify the reality of child abduction: “stereotypical” abductions don’t happen as often as I feared.
In our house
Regardless of the often sensationalized media reports, child abduction remains a very legitimate and open concern in our home. Although we closely supervise our young children, my wife and I began periodically broaching the subject of kidnapping with my son when he turned 4 years old. In a nutshell, this is how we discussed the kidnapping issue with my son:
Remind him that, although it happens infrequently, sometimes strangers take children;
Go over your basic safety rules and why they are so important;
Discuss and practice what to do if you ever feel threatened;
Ask him about the full names of his parents and his complete address;
Explain that we will never send a stranger to pick you up from preschool;
Assure him that it is our job as parents to protect him and his sister, and that he can tell us anything…we won’t be mad at him;
Encourage him to come to us with any questions or fears, no matter what.
Top 10 Prevention Tips
The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) provides excellent resources to help us prevent abductions and harm. Here’s a very general synopsis of his advice…
Take a friend with you when you go places and stay with the group;
Take appropriate action if you are approached or followed;
It is more important to escape from a threat than to be polite;
Talk openly with your children about safety and encourage communication;
Practice basic safety skills;
Get involved in your children’s activities;
Never leave children unattended in cars, running or not;
Know where your children are and with whom;
Get to know your child care providers, friends, neighbors, etc.;
Remember that you are your best resource;
If you would like some suggestions on how to start the conversation with your children or how to create “teachable moments,” I recommend you check out NCMEC’s Take 25 initiative.
OPSEC
Operational security, or “OPSEC,” was originally a military term describing the process of protecting small pieces of data that could be lumped together to provide a bigger picture. OPSEC can also apply to the safety of your children, because their names on backpacks, jackets, or lunch boxes could easily become a talking point for anyone looking for them. Ditto those stick figure “families” with the honor roll, school names, and vacation destination car stickers and personalized license plates… all the little bits of information someone could use to develop a false familiarity with your child.